After much discussion, one lady confronted me with their plan. "We're thinking of just leaving the United Methodist Church," she said. "And how would that be helpful to your church?" I asked.
"The United Methodist Church just has too many rules. If we leave it, we could do whatever we wanted."
I am not going to disagree that we have lots of regulation in ordering church life. That's the METHOd in Methodist. Every one of our rules has a history (the rule was made because somewhere along the line, a church got hurt when the policy was not in place) and a purpose (to make holy use of the bad experience to make sure the same thing doesn't happen to other churches). I have no trouble granting that United Methodists struggle --but benefit--from our organizing covenant.
But my question hadn't been answered. Would "being able to do whatever we wanted" be a good thing for the church?
My pastoral experience says that being free of the rules would, more likely, leave the church stranded in an inwardly focused self-centeredness. Mind you, I was talking with good people. But history bears me out: when people as individuals or groups get to do things their way, there's a spiritual trainwreck waiting to happen. That's why we do wealthy people no favors to let them think that their financial contribution can buy unquestioned influence in decision-making. That's why we do popular political or sports figures no favor when we adulate them and contribute to their spiritually false sense that they are better than anyone else. We see one life after another destroyed. The headlines are full of intelligent people, powerful people, talented people. and religious people who fall into life-wrecking sin because they got away from humility and accountability.
Do I think a church (or an individual or a nation) would be helped to be cut loose from accountability? Nothing in my years of pastoral experience suggests that people are better off without accountability. Everyone needs perspective and we, ourselves are often the last to see the perspective we so desperately need.
At the heart of Christian life is a willingness to leave self behind in order to put Christ first. No idea is more central that this core conviction. The Christian faith is not about having things our way. Christian faith is about having things God's way. Having things our way is about selfishness. Putting Christ's way first in all things is about selflessness. Having things our way intensifies our selfishness. Doing things God's way increases our unselfishness.
I don't mean to glorify the regulation and accountability of our church rules. Our rules can't make us the kind and loving people Christ has called us to be. But our regularized, methodical ways of ordering church life can streamline the administration of a church, keep people focused on the mission of following Jesus and avoid endless squabbling about how things should be done.
I know we have many brothers and sisters in Christ who worship God in congregational-based settings. I believe the "we get to decide what we want to do" settings leave congregations vulnerable to short-sightedness and limited perspective. Without accountability, what will save them from limited perspective?
Every mature Christian has lived long enough to be thankful that God didn't answer some prayer the way they had hoped.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
I think I've got it!
I think I've got it!
After 20+ hours of face-to-face meetings with Pastor-Parish Relations Committees, taking and transcribing careful notes into profiles, I know just what my churches want in pastoral leadership:
"Someone who is not too young because young preachers are too impatient for change and, well, you can't push people in the congregation too fast, you know. But we have to have someone young enough to attract young adults and work well with youth and children. That's where we are losing people."
"We need someone with energy -- lots of energy because we count on the preacher to do the ministry of the church. We will appreciate someone who can do it all -- visit the shut-ins, visit the senior members of the church who tend to feel neglected if the preacher doesn't stop by every week, take communion to people who missed the sacrament at church, preach, teach some Bible studies (and, by the way, we need a good precher who will keep our attention). It's nice if the preacher is also willing to teach Sunday School."
"Be sure to send us someone with thick skin. We have people who criticize everything the pastor does. They have been doing that for years. They don't come to church, but they still complain. It's only a handful of people, though. We haven't said anything to them because we don't want to hurt their feelings. We haven't stood up for our preacher the way we should. So be sure that whoever comes can take criticism."
"We need someone who is friendly and gets along well with people of all ages. We need someone who will be active in our community and a face for the church that we can be proud of. We need someone who will attract these young adults that we are missing without needing to change anything about the way we like to worship. We expect our pastor to give special attention to our members, notice and follow-up with the visitors. "
"We want someone who will make us proud to be members of our church but we don't want anyone to nag us for money. We want someone well-educated but not someone who will talk over our heads. We want our preacher to be in there working alongside us at our fundraisers. We want our minister to be fresh and rested as long as that doesn't mean taking a day off each week and all that vacation schedule that the conference has. There's a lot of work to be done at our church and we look to the minister to cover all the bases."
"We want a preacher who will respect our ways of doing things. If they are contrary to that Book of Discipline, the pastor should know that we've been doing things this way for a long time and we know what is best for our congregation."
"By the way, our pastor needs to be a man because our choir director grew up Baptist. We don't want to offend the choir director. And we want a pastor this time whose wife can sing in the choir and be active in church functions. If she sings alto, that wouuld be especially helpful. And, of course, we want children in the parsonage. That would really help boost our youth. If the new pastor and his wife has a son who could play tackle for the football team next year, that would be a big asset for the church."
"You can tell the cabinet that we know we need to change. We see that our church is declining and our members are on the senior side. But you just can't rush changes. We want someone who will help us take baby steps. Send us someone who will help us change without getting anyone upset."
Yes, indeed. I've got it.
I didn't make these up. Every one of those things have been said to me by some PPR committee in my district.
I take careful notes so that, when I write the profile, I won't confuse what they actually said with my imagination or a bad dream. I have accurately listed what they say they want. And if we, on the cabinet provide what they want, these churches will be gone in 10 years.
What they want to protect is their comfort zone. Their comfort zone and what they need to be vital, growing churches are very different things. Lord, have mercy.
After 20+ hours of face-to-face meetings with Pastor-Parish Relations Committees, taking and transcribing careful notes into profiles, I know just what my churches want in pastoral leadership:
"Someone who is not too young because young preachers are too impatient for change and, well, you can't push people in the congregation too fast, you know. But we have to have someone young enough to attract young adults and work well with youth and children. That's where we are losing people."
"We need someone with energy -- lots of energy because we count on the preacher to do the ministry of the church. We will appreciate someone who can do it all -- visit the shut-ins, visit the senior members of the church who tend to feel neglected if the preacher doesn't stop by every week, take communion to people who missed the sacrament at church, preach, teach some Bible studies (and, by the way, we need a good precher who will keep our attention). It's nice if the preacher is also willing to teach Sunday School."
"Be sure to send us someone with thick skin. We have people who criticize everything the pastor does. They have been doing that for years. They don't come to church, but they still complain. It's only a handful of people, though. We haven't said anything to them because we don't want to hurt their feelings. We haven't stood up for our preacher the way we should. So be sure that whoever comes can take criticism."
"We need someone who is friendly and gets along well with people of all ages. We need someone who will be active in our community and a face for the church that we can be proud of. We need someone who will attract these young adults that we are missing without needing to change anything about the way we like to worship. We expect our pastor to give special attention to our members, notice and follow-up with the visitors. "
"We want someone who will make us proud to be members of our church but we don't want anyone to nag us for money. We want someone well-educated but not someone who will talk over our heads. We want our preacher to be in there working alongside us at our fundraisers. We want our minister to be fresh and rested as long as that doesn't mean taking a day off each week and all that vacation schedule that the conference has. There's a lot of work to be done at our church and we look to the minister to cover all the bases."
"We want a preacher who will respect our ways of doing things. If they are contrary to that Book of Discipline, the pastor should know that we've been doing things this way for a long time and we know what is best for our congregation."
"By the way, our pastor needs to be a man because our choir director grew up Baptist. We don't want to offend the choir director. And we want a pastor this time whose wife can sing in the choir and be active in church functions. If she sings alto, that wouuld be especially helpful. And, of course, we want children in the parsonage. That would really help boost our youth. If the new pastor and his wife has a son who could play tackle for the football team next year, that would be a big asset for the church."
"You can tell the cabinet that we know we need to change. We see that our church is declining and our members are on the senior side. But you just can't rush changes. We want someone who will help us take baby steps. Send us someone who will help us change without getting anyone upset."
Yes, indeed. I've got it.
I didn't make these up. Every one of those things have been said to me by some PPR committee in my district.
I take careful notes so that, when I write the profile, I won't confuse what they actually said with my imagination or a bad dream. I have accurately listed what they say they want. And if we, on the cabinet provide what they want, these churches will be gone in 10 years.
What they want to protect is their comfort zone. Their comfort zone and what they need to be vital, growing churches are very different things. Lord, have mercy.
Friday, March 12, 2010
I should say I'm sorry
I should say I'm sorry that Carolina lost in the opening round of the ACC tournament and had such a miserable basketball season. I should say I'm sorry. But I'm not. Compassion is a challenge for me with Carolina fans.
Some day, I am going to write a book about serving churches full of Carolina fans. I have way too many stories about Carolina paraphanelia being left on my pulpit, sympathy cards when Duke lost and oh, the phone messages! After any Duke loss, there was a flood of phone messages. Anytime Carolina won, my consolation was I knew it was good for church attendance. They'd all be there, rubbing it in that Carolina had won. They'd come back early from a trip or off their sick bed if Carolina won and Duke lost. And, if Carolina lost or, the ultimate worst for them, Duke beat Carolina, I could be sure that Carolina fans were going to be sick and miss church.
I, as the pastor, of course, couldn't get sick and stay home. I had to come win or lose. So I have endured a lot through the rivalry through the years.
I grew up in Kentucky. I learned early to take my basketball very seriously. So I undertand Carolina fans are miserable. I should say I am sorry. But it wouldn't really be true. And I have lots of sympathy cards from Carolina fans who were only trying to rub it in.
So I'll tell the truth. I'm not sorry. But I'm not going to be obnoxious about it to people who are already down. I'm not going to do unto others like they have done unto me.
Some day, I am going to write a book about serving churches full of Carolina fans. I have way too many stories about Carolina paraphanelia being left on my pulpit, sympathy cards when Duke lost and oh, the phone messages! After any Duke loss, there was a flood of phone messages. Anytime Carolina won, my consolation was I knew it was good for church attendance. They'd all be there, rubbing it in that Carolina had won. They'd come back early from a trip or off their sick bed if Carolina won and Duke lost. And, if Carolina lost or, the ultimate worst for them, Duke beat Carolina, I could be sure that Carolina fans were going to be sick and miss church.
I, as the pastor, of course, couldn't get sick and stay home. I had to come win or lose. So I have endured a lot through the rivalry through the years.
I grew up in Kentucky. I learned early to take my basketball very seriously. So I undertand Carolina fans are miserable. I should say I am sorry. But it wouldn't really be true. And I have lots of sympathy cards from Carolina fans who were only trying to rub it in.
So I'll tell the truth. I'm not sorry. But I'm not going to be obnoxious about it to people who are already down. I'm not going to do unto others like they have done unto me.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Prepare to be amazed!
Last Sunday, I left for church in a winter coat and long knit scarf. The temperature was in the high 30's and the weather people were predicting snow. I am long past tired of the cold of winter.
This week, the weather did, indeed, turn into snow. Tuesday, about noon, snow began to blanket the world around here. I was supposed to pick up my 5 year old grandson for an overnight visit. I flirted with the idea of trying to postpone our overnight date. But, when I called to get his mother's advice, she said, "He is really excited."
That sealed it. I would have driven through a blizzard to get him rather than disappoint him. And the drive felt like a blizzard of snow. Clomping through snow that was, at that point, 4 - 6" deep to pick him up, he popped out the kitchen door, suitcase in hand, face lit up like a light bulb saying, "Grammy, I'm ready!" That was worth everything.
I drove slowly and carefully back to Statesville with my eager beaver and wondered if winter was ever going to be over this year.
This Sunday, the sunshine matched the exhilarating warmth -- nearly 60 degrees today. The longed-for change was beginning to appear. I looked back to my doubting from just a few days ago. I very clearly remembered the discouraging feeling that the winter was going to last forever.
Connor has been in a five day a week preschool program this year. One day just a few months ago, he came bounding in my house, picked up a clipboard and a pencil, ran in my sunroom and cheerfully called out, "Grammy, don't come in until I tell you -- but prepare to be amazed!"
And, after some time, he DID amaze me by bringing out a paper where he had written his name by himself. I loved it. And since that time, I have thought of his exuberant words: "Prepare to be amazed!"
What if we, in the church, would hear those words as God's encouraging voice? In the winter that has been long and cold, hasn't God been whispering, "Prepare to be amazed!" with the springtime that will unfold. When Finance Committees meet and moan about the economy and the short financial resources, don't you think that, somewhere, God is calling out for faithfulness and "Prepare to be amazed! I am the God of abundance." For people who are stuck in discouraging situations in their lives, I believe God is opening doors beyond what we can see and encouraging us to "Prepare to be amazed! My grace goes before you!" And on that low-point of human history when Jesus was nailed to a cross -- even then, God was saying "Prepare to be amazed!"
As spring unfolds this year, can we recapture our sense of wonder and joy about God's powerful, creative work in our lives and in our world? In the soberness of Lent, let us prepare to be amazed.
This week, the weather did, indeed, turn into snow. Tuesday, about noon, snow began to blanket the world around here. I was supposed to pick up my 5 year old grandson for an overnight visit. I flirted with the idea of trying to postpone our overnight date. But, when I called to get his mother's advice, she said, "He is really excited."
That sealed it. I would have driven through a blizzard to get him rather than disappoint him. And the drive felt like a blizzard of snow. Clomping through snow that was, at that point, 4 - 6" deep to pick him up, he popped out the kitchen door, suitcase in hand, face lit up like a light bulb saying, "Grammy, I'm ready!" That was worth everything.
I drove slowly and carefully back to Statesville with my eager beaver and wondered if winter was ever going to be over this year.
This Sunday, the sunshine matched the exhilarating warmth -- nearly 60 degrees today. The longed-for change was beginning to appear. I looked back to my doubting from just a few days ago. I very clearly remembered the discouraging feeling that the winter was going to last forever.
Connor has been in a five day a week preschool program this year. One day just a few months ago, he came bounding in my house, picked up a clipboard and a pencil, ran in my sunroom and cheerfully called out, "Grammy, don't come in until I tell you -- but prepare to be amazed!"
And, after some time, he DID amaze me by bringing out a paper where he had written his name by himself. I loved it. And since that time, I have thought of his exuberant words: "Prepare to be amazed!"
What if we, in the church, would hear those words as God's encouraging voice? In the winter that has been long and cold, hasn't God been whispering, "Prepare to be amazed!" with the springtime that will unfold. When Finance Committees meet and moan about the economy and the short financial resources, don't you think that, somewhere, God is calling out for faithfulness and "Prepare to be amazed! I am the God of abundance." For people who are stuck in discouraging situations in their lives, I believe God is opening doors beyond what we can see and encouraging us to "Prepare to be amazed! My grace goes before you!" And on that low-point of human history when Jesus was nailed to a cross -- even then, God was saying "Prepare to be amazed!"
As spring unfolds this year, can we recapture our sense of wonder and joy about God's powerful, creative work in our lives and in our world? In the soberness of Lent, let us prepare to be amazed.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
It's That Time of Year
It's that time of year.
Here we go for the marathon of appointment-making for ministry deployment for our United Methodist Churches for the upcoming conference year. Churches and ministers had a window of prayerful time to turn in a request to be considered in this year's appointment round.
This is the time of year that people start swamping me with their opinions. They tell me that their preacher HAS to stay. Their church just can't go on if their preacher has to move.
Other people want to make sure I know that their pastor HAS to leave. Their pastor has ruined their church and what they need is a new preacher.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Both of these oft-repeated positions show the shallow understanding too many United Methodists have of ministry.
In the first case, let me say that I am thrilled when people have good things to say about their pastor. If good growth is taking place, I love to hear about it. But if a ministry is solid, it is not dependent on the preacher. Every good United Methodist knows that their preacher doesn't HAVE to stay. We are, at the very core of who we are, a denomination of itinerant preachers. The ministry of our churches is not meant to be built around the personality of any one preacher. The United Methodist emphasis for ministry is exactly where it should be: the MINISTRY is always bigger than the MINISTER. The temptation to ego and personality-centered ministry is alleviated if not eliminated. And that's a gift to the clergy and to congregations.
And, in the case where people are telling me that the answer to their problems is a new preacher, I have exactly the same response: the MINISTRY is always bigger than the MINISTER. Congregations need to keep that in mind. I am a passionate advocate of strong clergy leadership. But I believe that the congregation is the determining factor of whether a church moves forward or not.
We have too many churches that think a new preacher is the solution. Plenty of times, congregations have just the leadership they need. But, instead of following their clergy leader, they resist. They complain and undermine and sabatoge their own growth because they don't want to do anything different. Comfort zones are the sacred cows. Sometimes, somebody got their feelings hurt and they willingly turn that into a war against the pastor. God help us. We end up with wounded pastors and discredited congregations. Everyone loses the "Blame the Pastor" game. We've got plenty of churches who want a pastoral change but they are not willing to change. And they're not growing -- not because of the PASTOR--but because of the way they treat each other. And no change of pastors is going to fix that fundamental deficiency.
I thank God for the churches that are growing in inspiring, fruitful ways. But they are mistaken if they think their success depends on keeping their pastor. The ministry of a church --if it is to last and be a faithful reflection of God--must not be built around the personality of any minister. For everyone in church -- clergy AND laity--we believe that everyone is important but no one is indispensable. That helps us not get sidetracked on ego issues.
I pray for the churches that are discouraged about their declines. I pray that we will send them strong clergy leaders but more: I pray that congregations will develop a deep, shared conviction that the ministry of their church is always bigger than the minister. The success of any congregation in new growth requires people who open their hearts and minds and doors to others. Not even the best preacher can make up for the absence of openness in the hearts of the congregation.
Yes, it's that time of year again.
Don't forget to pray for the Bishop and cabinet every day. Pray for our preachers. And pray for our congregations that, together, what we do will help us all keep our perspective: the ministry is always bigger than the ministers.
Here we go for the marathon of appointment-making for ministry deployment for our United Methodist Churches for the upcoming conference year. Churches and ministers had a window of prayerful time to turn in a request to be considered in this year's appointment round.
This is the time of year that people start swamping me with their opinions. They tell me that their preacher HAS to stay. Their church just can't go on if their preacher has to move.
Other people want to make sure I know that their pastor HAS to leave. Their pastor has ruined their church and what they need is a new preacher.
I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Both of these oft-repeated positions show the shallow understanding too many United Methodists have of ministry.
In the first case, let me say that I am thrilled when people have good things to say about their pastor. If good growth is taking place, I love to hear about it. But if a ministry is solid, it is not dependent on the preacher. Every good United Methodist knows that their preacher doesn't HAVE to stay. We are, at the very core of who we are, a denomination of itinerant preachers. The ministry of our churches is not meant to be built around the personality of any one preacher. The United Methodist emphasis for ministry is exactly where it should be: the MINISTRY is always bigger than the MINISTER. The temptation to ego and personality-centered ministry is alleviated if not eliminated. And that's a gift to the clergy and to congregations.
And, in the case where people are telling me that the answer to their problems is a new preacher, I have exactly the same response: the MINISTRY is always bigger than the MINISTER. Congregations need to keep that in mind. I am a passionate advocate of strong clergy leadership. But I believe that the congregation is the determining factor of whether a church moves forward or not.
We have too many churches that think a new preacher is the solution. Plenty of times, congregations have just the leadership they need. But, instead of following their clergy leader, they resist. They complain and undermine and sabatoge their own growth because they don't want to do anything different. Comfort zones are the sacred cows. Sometimes, somebody got their feelings hurt and they willingly turn that into a war against the pastor. God help us. We end up with wounded pastors and discredited congregations. Everyone loses the "Blame the Pastor" game. We've got plenty of churches who want a pastoral change but they are not willing to change. And they're not growing -- not because of the PASTOR--but because of the way they treat each other. And no change of pastors is going to fix that fundamental deficiency.
I thank God for the churches that are growing in inspiring, fruitful ways. But they are mistaken if they think their success depends on keeping their pastor. The ministry of a church --if it is to last and be a faithful reflection of God--must not be built around the personality of any minister. For everyone in church -- clergy AND laity--we believe that everyone is important but no one is indispensable. That helps us not get sidetracked on ego issues.
I pray for the churches that are discouraged about their declines. I pray that we will send them strong clergy leaders but more: I pray that congregations will develop a deep, shared conviction that the ministry of their church is always bigger than the minister. The success of any congregation in new growth requires people who open their hearts and minds and doors to others. Not even the best preacher can make up for the absence of openness in the hearts of the congregation.
Yes, it's that time of year again.
Don't forget to pray for the Bishop and cabinet every day. Pray for our preachers. And pray for our congregations that, together, what we do will help us all keep our perspective: the ministry is always bigger than the ministers.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
