New Year's resolutions to change are so fleeting! Early in January, people start joking about how their resolve has already evaporated.
Then early in the spring, Lent rolls around and offers another chance to self-discipline and focusing on priorities. Through my years as a pastor, people seemed skeptical, surprised and then delighted to learn that Sundays are exempt from the fasts of Lent. Sunday after Sunday, people enjoyed the tea, chocolate, cokes, desserts that they had given up for Lent until the final joyful celebration of Easter.
I have lost count of how many years I have given up something for Lent. I've given up diet coke, tea, chocolate, dessert, reading the newspaper. Each year, I try to honestly give up something that I will really miss. Confirmands used to try to get me to bless their decision to give up broccoli. Usually, it only took one question to discover that they don't eat broccoli to begin with. Clever approach, but no deal.
Every year, giving up something for Lent is a learning experience and, at Easter, I know I'm the better for it. Most years, when I get to Easter, I happily resume my former habits. This past year, however, Lent made a lasting difference.
I decided to give up the morning news.
That may not sound like much. But it was a big change of routine for me. Getting out of bed in the morning and turning on the morning news was basically one single action for me. I have always been a news junkie. I read 3 newspapers every day, several weekly papers as well as internet news, television news and National Public Radio news. I just like knowing what is going on. So watching the early morning news was as natural as breathing.
Last year, I gave up tv in the morning because it was a change of routine that mattered. I decided I wouldn't watch the morning news at all and I wouldn't read a newspaper until after my daily Bible reading. The first few days were hard. I was sorely tempted to cheat. Since I live alone, who would know?
But I stuck with my resolve. I didn't cheat. And I began to notice a big difference in my disposition. I realized that I didn't start the day nearly as frazzled or tense. Challenges were still there, problems demanding attention --but I started out more centered. Until I gave it up, I didn't realize how much tension my passion for the news was creating in my life. Last year, once Easter came, I stayed with the lesson my Lenten discipline had taught me. In addition, I added another component: I stopped watching the 11:00 news. I found it was a lot easier to go to sleep peacefully if I hadn't just filled my head with the traumas and tragedies of the day.
Last year's Lent gave me a learning opportunity and change that has lasted--a lesson that has blessed me every day.
Lent is a laboratory of learning. And what good are lessons if we don't apply them to life? That's the adventure of growing in Christian love--that's how abundant life in Christ gets enriched by walking in faithfulness.
This year, may Lent bring lessons of sacrifice that bless and lead us to maturity.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
The most important question
Oh, how many days turn out differently than what I have planned!
I can start out the day with an up-to-date calendar and an efficient list and, after a very busy day, I look down and the to-do list is untouched and new things have been added. Charles Shedd, in his classic book A Time for All Things says that one of the secrets to a joyful Christian life is to learn to make friends with divine interruptions. Decades after first reading his challenge, I am still working on welcoming interruptions.
Learning to welcome interruptions is not one of those optional skills for ministry. Whether or not you can make coffee or stir barbeque meat at dawn for the annual fund-raiser--THOSE are optional ministry skills. But learning to deal with interruptions? That is in the category of necessary skills.
I have spent a lot of time and money on time management guides. I have mastered multi-tasking to the max. I have learned to work smarter and not just more. I still struggle with the idea that "more is less" (a phrase that I do not believe is automatically true). But, finally, I think I have made some progress.
After spending three days completely differently than I had expected, I looked around at my to-do list, my house and my coming week. Instead of asking "what did I get done and what is still ahead of me?", (a question that inevitably leads to overwhelm), I asked the more important question: Did I do what was MOST important? Although I didn't get around to doing the things on my dream list, I spent my time lined up with my priorities of what is most important. And I realized that I had stumbled onto the place of true peace.
Success isn't getting everything done. In every area of life, there is always more to do than time to do it: taking care of a home, taking care of a family, serving a church and, certainly serving a district. Every night, when I have time to pray and reflect, the "to do" list is still long no matter how productive the day has been. So I need to stop judging the day by how much I am checking off the list--a list that, by the very nature of a caring heart and creative spirit is always going to keep growing.
The question that matters is not how much did I check off my list. The question at the heart of a faithful life is this: Did I spend my time doing what is most important? If I can say "yes" to that question, it won't matter how many things are still on the list for days to come.
I can start out the day with an up-to-date calendar and an efficient list and, after a very busy day, I look down and the to-do list is untouched and new things have been added. Charles Shedd, in his classic book A Time for All Things says that one of the secrets to a joyful Christian life is to learn to make friends with divine interruptions. Decades after first reading his challenge, I am still working on welcoming interruptions.
Learning to welcome interruptions is not one of those optional skills for ministry. Whether or not you can make coffee or stir barbeque meat at dawn for the annual fund-raiser--THOSE are optional ministry skills. But learning to deal with interruptions? That is in the category of necessary skills.
I have spent a lot of time and money on time management guides. I have mastered multi-tasking to the max. I have learned to work smarter and not just more. I still struggle with the idea that "more is less" (a phrase that I do not believe is automatically true). But, finally, I think I have made some progress.
After spending three days completely differently than I had expected, I looked around at my to-do list, my house and my coming week. Instead of asking "what did I get done and what is still ahead of me?", (a question that inevitably leads to overwhelm), I asked the more important question: Did I do what was MOST important? Although I didn't get around to doing the things on my dream list, I spent my time lined up with my priorities of what is most important. And I realized that I had stumbled onto the place of true peace.
Success isn't getting everything done. In every area of life, there is always more to do than time to do it: taking care of a home, taking care of a family, serving a church and, certainly serving a district. Every night, when I have time to pray and reflect, the "to do" list is still long no matter how productive the day has been. So I need to stop judging the day by how much I am checking off the list--a list that, by the very nature of a caring heart and creative spirit is always going to keep growing.
The question that matters is not how much did I check off my list. The question at the heart of a faithful life is this: Did I spend my time doing what is most important? If I can say "yes" to that question, it won't matter how many things are still on the list for days to come.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Be careful about getting on board...
I have lived long enough to know that putting heroes on a pedastal is a prescription for disappointment. Sports figures, political figures, religious people all take big falls from grace -- just like the biblical characters. Although, since most of the Bible stories I learned as a child, I learned the Sunday school, child-appropriate version. So, as a young adult, I was completely aghast to hear Mary Cosby say that it is a mistake to teach our children to be like biblical characters. That threw me for a loop. Slowly, I realized how right she is. Although there are a few (but very few) exceptions, good people in the Bible stories turn out to be terrible disappointments and the Bible characters who make terrible mistakes turn out to be heroes. When you follow the whole lives of the biblical characters, you see she is right.
But, still, our hearts love to have heroes -- spokespersons for the values and principles that we hold dear. And when the disappointment comes -- as it almost inevitably does--the disillusionment hurts. And there have been a lot of prominent people who have let us down in recent months. They are on both sides of the political aisle (Mark Sanford and John Edwards) so don't even think about appealing to partisan carping. And the things we have learned make us wonder all over again: how can such smart people do such terrible destructive things?
Every new revelation about the life of John Edwards makes me want to say,"All Aboard" to the train of laments about how dishonorable his actions have been. He failed his family, he failed his causes, he failed his best self and he failed people who believed in him. I'm disappointed in him in every way possible. This week, I went over the top when, at the announcement of his separation from his wife, Elizabeth, he said, "I want my children to know that I love them more than anything in the world..." And I wanted to scream: "You can't do the things you did and then, in the wreckage you have made of your family, come along and proclaim your love for your children. No sale. It doesn't work that way. If you love your family more than anything, you put them first. Your love for them changes the way you act. You don't love someone and then going around doing destructive things like that. Love isn't just a word you can throw around. Love is something that shows in what you DO with your life." Oh I was steaming!
Especially while all these tawdry revelations are fresh, it is easy to jump on the criticize-John-Edwards train. But as I think about it, John Edwards isn't the only one who thinks that he can say one thing and do another. The church is full of people who SAY they love God more than anything. But their actions tell a different story. A very different story. The beautiful few chapters of I John are very poignant in describing this great chasm--plainly stating that if you say you love God and hate your brother or sister, you are a liar. Ouch.
As one expose after another has come to light, I have found myself thinking over and over, "How in the world did he think he was going to get away with that? Did he not realize that big transgressions like this were bound to be exposed?" And, while I don't have the answer to that question for John Edwards, I think the same question applies to the life of a Christian. Do people really think that they can be hateful to their brothers and sisters--an explicit violation of Jesus' command to love one another as He loved us--and get away with it? The tragic history of race relations in this nation tells me that too many people have the same disconnect between their behavior and God's command to love. Do people who violate Jesus' explicit teaching to love actually think that they can violate God's law that seriously and spout off some Sunday morning affirmation of John 3:16 and expect everything will be ok? Love is something that shows--or doesn't show--in actions.
In my uncharitable opinion right now, John Edwards deserves every word of criticism directed at him. So does Mark Sanford. So does Tiger Woods -- and the list goes on and on. And they are, especially right now, easy targets. But every time we point a finger at someone else, four fingers point back to us. Do our actions stand up to our professed loves? Do we think that we can blatantly ignore the main teachings of Jesus and get away with it? Although our situations may not have reached the headlines or television news flashes, the disconnect between professed love and life actions puts us in the same boat with the disgraced public figures. Our actions will measure the truth of what we say. And we dare not think we can have a big disconnect between our proclamations and our actions and think we will not get caught.
But, still, our hearts love to have heroes -- spokespersons for the values and principles that we hold dear. And when the disappointment comes -- as it almost inevitably does--the disillusionment hurts. And there have been a lot of prominent people who have let us down in recent months. They are on both sides of the political aisle (Mark Sanford and John Edwards) so don't even think about appealing to partisan carping. And the things we have learned make us wonder all over again: how can such smart people do such terrible destructive things?
Every new revelation about the life of John Edwards makes me want to say,"All Aboard" to the train of laments about how dishonorable his actions have been. He failed his family, he failed his causes, he failed his best self and he failed people who believed in him. I'm disappointed in him in every way possible. This week, I went over the top when, at the announcement of his separation from his wife, Elizabeth, he said, "I want my children to know that I love them more than anything in the world..." And I wanted to scream: "You can't do the things you did and then, in the wreckage you have made of your family, come along and proclaim your love for your children. No sale. It doesn't work that way. If you love your family more than anything, you put them first. Your love for them changes the way you act. You don't love someone and then going around doing destructive things like that. Love isn't just a word you can throw around. Love is something that shows in what you DO with your life." Oh I was steaming!
Especially while all these tawdry revelations are fresh, it is easy to jump on the criticize-John-Edwards train. But as I think about it, John Edwards isn't the only one who thinks that he can say one thing and do another. The church is full of people who SAY they love God more than anything. But their actions tell a different story. A very different story. The beautiful few chapters of I John are very poignant in describing this great chasm--plainly stating that if you say you love God and hate your brother or sister, you are a liar. Ouch.
As one expose after another has come to light, I have found myself thinking over and over, "How in the world did he think he was going to get away with that? Did he not realize that big transgressions like this were bound to be exposed?" And, while I don't have the answer to that question for John Edwards, I think the same question applies to the life of a Christian. Do people really think that they can be hateful to their brothers and sisters--an explicit violation of Jesus' command to love one another as He loved us--and get away with it? The tragic history of race relations in this nation tells me that too many people have the same disconnect between their behavior and God's command to love. Do people who violate Jesus' explicit teaching to love actually think that they can violate God's law that seriously and spout off some Sunday morning affirmation of John 3:16 and expect everything will be ok? Love is something that shows--or doesn't show--in actions.
In my uncharitable opinion right now, John Edwards deserves every word of criticism directed at him. So does Mark Sanford. So does Tiger Woods -- and the list goes on and on. And they are, especially right now, easy targets. But every time we point a finger at someone else, four fingers point back to us. Do our actions stand up to our professed loves? Do we think that we can blatantly ignore the main teachings of Jesus and get away with it? Although our situations may not have reached the headlines or television news flashes, the disconnect between professed love and life actions puts us in the same boat with the disgraced public figures. Our actions will measure the truth of what we say. And we dare not think we can have a big disconnect between our proclamations and our actions and think we will not get caught.
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